The Waiting is the hardest part...Orig blogged on 3/27/09

Just sitting here anxiously waiting for Grandbaby #5 to come in to the world. The waiting is the hardest part, but worth it in the end. Things are going okay here for the most part. Still have a house at this point, but still waiting to hear if we can get help to stave off foreclosure. Mike is still fighting to get his Worker's Compensation, which could be another 5-6 months. Our attorney has been a positive for us and working hard to get things straight. He says that the attorney for the isurance company is just "throwing shit against the wall to see what sticks". So far, it ain't sticking. The WC judge has got to be as annoyed as we are at this point. Mike's last hearing in February was a total farce. Almost 3 hours of absolute BS by the insurance attorney after our attorney quesioned Mike for, maybe 15 minutes. Just frustrating, but the insurance company has the same right to be heard as we do. It is just that are dragging it out and destroying us financially. With Mike out of work and approximately 6-7 more months before he can go back to work, our income bites. I may be getting my diagnosis as far as my pain issues that I have dealt with for the past 5 years. My physical therapist, had mentioned what she thought it was back in 2005, but she can't diagnose, so nothing was done about. I had mentioned it to my doctor, but she didn't follow up on it and neither did my other doctors. My doctor didn't know a lot about it and admitted it to me. I finally did some research on what we think it is and got it to my doctor and I finally can see the light at the end of my long, dark tunnel. WooHoo!!! I see my Pain Doctor in April, and hopefully he will set me up to get an injection in my sacroiliac joint, which if it takes my symptoms away, sets me up for the diagnosis. You'd think I wouldn't be happy knowing I'd get an injection there, but truthfully, if it works, it is all worth it. I received 3-4 back injections within the first couple years of my injury, that didn't help at all. Honestly, you would think they'd be painful to get, but it wasn't all that bad. We are looking at a diagnosis of Sacroiliac Joint Dysfunction. I guess I should tell you why we have that light at the end of the tunnel. Mike had gone to church one Sunday and there was a missionary who spoke that day. They had to get out of missions work due to his wife dealing with years of problems with back, butt and leg pain. Same as me. It took her years to get a diagnosis, but they finally did and today, after a pelvic fusion surgery, she is making up for her lost years due to pain. Anyway, Mike had the opportunity to speak to her husband after the service and asked him if he would have her call me. Kerri called me later that evening and we spent over an hour discussing this. Her first questions had to do with my symptoms. I was in tears talking to her as she pegged me to a tee. She also understood my emotional issues. One thing she talked about, that I really related to, was that the pain gets so bad, that you want to die. You think of ways that you could make it happen, but it is only a thought. You also go through periods of thinking that maybe it is all in your head, because it seems that no one believes you are suffering, so you end up thinking you are crazy. Mike admitted to me that after all these years, he believed it wasn't real and that I was not so much faking, but having psychological issues. I do realize other family members, my daughter and a sister included, believed it was psychological. Because it is a hard thing to diagnose, you start to believe you are mental. You try to justify it all. A lot of doctors haven't heard or dealt with it, so getting relief is hard. The hard part is trying to explain your pain and because it is hard to explain, you can't get the diagnosis. Kerri had to go to Atlanta to get this surgery. She had the shots, the pain patches, the drugs, physical therapy, electric shock therapy. Anything for relief. I have been through all these and have finally settled on taking meds for relief. They don't always work, but I am tired of trying everything and anything. When I told Kerri how it happened, she said that is a textbook injury and the outcome. When I originally hurt my back, it was all on the right side. About 5 weeks later, during PT, the Dr. asked where my pain was and I told him, my pain was on the left. He mentioned that was strange as I went to him with the pain on my right. Seems that it what happens with SIJD. When you hurt one side, the opposite side tries to compensate for the other side and the muscles and joint work harder to help the other side heal. Apparently, my sacro and pelvic joint come undone, and the muscles are now to weak to keep them in place. My doctor remembered that before Christmas in 2007, I had told her, I slipped on some ice, getting out of the Jeep and I felt something pop in my hip area, hurt like heck for a second, but there was no more pain in my hip, butt, back or leg. I was able to walk with no pain, dance with my grandsons, do everything normally. I even stopped taking my pain meds. I felt so good. But after about 2 weeks, it all went back to pain. Kerri said I probably popped everything back into place, and I overdid for those 2 blessed weeks, and it all popped out again and my doc said that was possible. This is why my doctor set me up with my pain doc again. She believes an injection will give the diagnosis and she has been researching it. Thank God!!!! I am praying for this diagnosis and will happily endure surgery if it means getting my life back. Mike is healing well with his spinal fusion and got a good report from the neurosurgeon. They ended up fusing 6 vertebrae and he has a rod and 12 screws in his back. One problem he has, is resting. He is so bored and does stuff he shouldn't and then wonders why he hurts bad the next day or days later. My sister and brother-in-law help us with taking our garbage to the dump. We invited them over for dinner last night and they cleaned off our back porch. Raccoons have gotten in the garbage and scattered it around. Mike went out on the porch one night to scare a raccoon away, but it hissed at him, so he came back in the house, a bit scared. LOL He said the raccon was as big as a medium sized dog. There is a bag of trash that a raccon or bear hauled of fthe porch and scattered in the woods above our house. We had a bear, one year, that dragged our BBQ grill into the woods. I thought it had gotten stolen. Outdoor life is great....and fun sometimes.For now, will close. I'll try to write more often so it isn't as long. LOL